Hearing God

Part of growing up is letting go of some of the ideas you held as a child. For instance, you learn that parents aren't perfect and neither is any relationship you will ever have. My current situation is not at all one that I ever saw myself being in. I am pursuing a relationship that puts me at odds with my best friend. I have two reasons to justify my actions. The lesser one is that I would never have done this if she had feelings for this guy. The most important reason is that God is leading me in this direction. I have always struggled with allowing God to direct me before I moved. This time I have done my best to do just that. I've done nothing but pray since there was even a shadow of impending confusion on the horizon. And I feel that God is leading me to pursue this relationship whatever it may turn into. My relationship with my best friend is hugely important to me, but I like to think that relationship is not based on others' opinion of my ability to hear and follow God. I am not perfect, but neither is anyone else. We are incapable of being perfect because we are human. The first two humans screwed that up for the rest of us and the result was conflict. Sometimes I feel bad because I don't feel bad. I regret that I have hurt a friend, but I don't doubt my hearing God. Therefore I can rest assured that if this is God everything will work out and fall into place. So while I'm not enjoying my best friend and I's troubled relationship I still believe I am doing what God would have me to do.